Husband and I are under contract for a house. This is exciting and although not a done deal as we have three weeks before closing, I don't forsee this going south on us. It's a huge house and although I really like the house, I am still mourning the fact that we won't be building our dream home. This home has a lot of what we want, but not everything and that makes me a little sad. I posted a little bit about this on social media and as you would expect, there had to be one person who says, "Sometimes God completely changes the direction of what we thought we wanted or needed, into something just as beautiful!" Now, I agree that sometimes Plan F can be as awesome as Plan A. Rarely is it something better, but it will do just as well. This house IS beautiful, but it is also three stories on 1/3 of an acre with a ton of carpeting that my cat will most certainly tear to shreds. Not the one story house on 3 1/2 acres with hardwood floors that we could grow old in. We will have to sell this house when we are old because I will not be climbing those stairs at 80. Obviously, I don't believe that God was the one who orchestrated this change. I can also already see the downsides of this, the first being that our friends who were going to build a house next door to us are now going to be a 15-20 minute drive away. This makes me incredibly sad. It also means that we are still in a bad school district, which isn't great for any future kids we adopt. No. We made this choice. We could have chosen to wait and get a different house. We live in an area that has a lot of great houses on the market in our price range. But we decided to jump on this one. Also, the idea that there is a god out there controlling where people live is absolutely ridiculous. I've been following Humans of New York (HONY) for years on Facebook and this week he is in Rwanda. The stories are horrific. Are you telling me that a loving god who cares what neighborhood I live in, didn't think it was important to control where Tutsis were residing right before the genocide that killed over a million people? You mean he didn't tell all those people, some of which were surely Christian, to move? Or for a closer to home example, I have some friends who moved into a house that they were told was pet free. This is important because my friend's husband is deathly allergic to cats. Turns out, this was a lie. The second day there he was cleaning out the basement and went into anaphylactic shock. Turns out the people before them had a cat and the landlord thought that if he cleaned it good, it wouldn't matter. It did. Landlord ended up paying the medical bills and let them out of their lease. Did this god not care about this man's life? They could have chosen other places? If there is a god out there who truly cares about where people live, then why would he put them in such a situation? To me the answer is simple...if there is a god, he doesn't give a flying shit about where you live. It doesn't care about what you want or need, nor does it have any cares about whether your living situation will harm you, make your life miserable, or even kill you. At almost every intersection of life, we human make choices that create ripples out into the universe. Since we have no idea what those butterfly effects are, we can only do our best. The purchasing of this house could be great for our family, or it could be a terrible choice. Time will tell. Either way, I rest easy with the knowledge that I am the orchestrator of my own destiny and future, for good or bad.
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AuthorThis is a personal, but secret, blog archiving my deconversion from a Christian to a non-believer. Archives
December 2020
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