A few days ago I was on the phone with my brother discussing various subjects. As these things do sometimes, the subject turned towards something that many Christians seem to have issues with. In the past, this particular brother has expressed some opinions that are definitely different than what my parents taught us (and what my other two brothers still believe) yet is a bit wishy washy on certain aspects, as if he is struggling to rectify what we have been taught vs what he now knows.
This seemed like a good time to mention to him that this is one of the many things that I take issue with in regards to Christianity and that I no longer believe what I have been taught. To which he cautiously told me that there is a lot about Christianity itself that he doesn't believe. I, in turn, took this as an opportunity to tell him that I don't think I am a Christian anymore. And that spurred a conversation in which both my brother and I told each other that neither of us were believers anymore. Some of his quotes: "I figured out that Christianity was wrong just by looking at how people acted. I'm sure you did it by reading, but mine was just observation." "I feel like I have been lied to." "[My girlfriend] doesn't feel comfortable in our family because of the religion thing." "Mom wants to know why I am not dating a Christian girl? It's because I'm not a Christian." "Can you believe there are two of us from one family?" It was, in a word, relief. It is nice to know that I am not the only one. That someone else in my immediate family has also rejected religion. Obviously, he did this a long time ago and at a much younger age. And has been lying about it for years to my parents. I suspected that if anyone was going to be okay with it, it would be him, but it is so hard to know where people stand. Especially if that person has spent a lot of time avoiding spilling the beans. He told me that it is the main reason he doesn't visit my parents too often, especially with his girlfriend. It is why he quit sharing things with my family years ago. It is why he doesn't ask my parents or other brother for advice. It turns out "why don't you pray about it?" isn't an acceptable piece of advice for him either. It also makes sense that he came to his conclusions through people observation, because that is how he is. And it makes sense that I came to my conclusions through reading. "We'll talk about this again soon," I promised. "Yeah." He paused. "[Sister]. I love you. Thanks for telling me."
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AuthorThis is a personal, but secret, blog archiving my deconversion from a Christian to a non-believer. Archives
December 2020
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